3 STEPS TO RELATIONSHIP DETOX

“When I first started GEMS, everyone literally told me I was crazy…there were people who walked away from me, and people who I had to choose to walk away from. But I felt so strongly that this was what I was meant to do that I just couldn’t really be deterred. I had to at least try.”
- Rachel Lloyd, Founder & Executive Director, Girls Educational & Mentoring Services

We’ve heard the sayings “Tell me who your best friends are and I will tell you who you are.” Or “Birds of a feather flock together.” The one I like is “Be conscious of the company you keep as you become your company.” Take it from someone who didn’t really process this until my mid-30′s, it’s too easy to just live our lives and not realize how we adopt the habits, values and mindsets of those we spend the most time with. Just as we need to nurture our bodies with healthy foods, we need to feed our surroundings with people who will be positive influences. Here are 3 things to get conscious about:

1. Take Inventory of Your Relationships
Are there any people in your life who more often impart negativity, stress, worry or insecurity? Think about how long that has been going on and whether it is serving your goal of becoming a more fulfilled and successful person. You don’t necessarily need to cut them from your life, but get more strategic about limiting your exposure to them and prepare yourself mentally for when you do see them.

2. Surround Yourself with Those That Boost Your Spirits & Confidence
There will always be naysayers who make you doubt your ideas or who deflate your confidence. Maximize time with those who share similar values, enhance your spirits and and believe in you. You want to walk away feeling more motivated and inspired than the opposite.

3. Proactively Seek the Right Mentors & Environments
Every few months I need to step back from my crazy schedule to re-connect with my long term dreams and assess whether my actions are aligned with those goals. It’s a critical exercise that takes discipline but once we realize where we need development, we can proactively seek relevant mentors, networking groups and professional events.

Our environments and community shape who we are and affect where we are going, so be more strategic about the company you keep and do it with grace, gratitude and reciprocation.